| | I've been thinking a lot about looks. mine especially. this may sound really weird, but i know that i'm ridiculous. before i go any further, please please understand that this isn't a blog where i am fishing for the "don't worry, you are beautiful" comments. in fact, i'll be a little upset if i get them.
although most people don't think i'm hispanic at first sight, i don't know that my features are really "white". i have actually been asked a few times by curious strangers what ethnicity i am. i also know that i am not conventionally good looking. i have also been told by various friends (like 3 or 4 actually..) that when their friends that don't know me see pictures of me they say that i am "Pretty, in a different or unique way..." that's a nice compliment. i have no career aspirations as a model, so that's just fine with me.
i have lots of friends who are absolutely beautiful, and command the male attention when they walk into a room (lizzy-who, this is you :) i know this will never be me. i'm not absolutely stunning in pictures, i'm just me. how much of what makes me or you attractive can be held in a photo? i know pictures can capture beautiful moments, and express what a person really is like at times...and at others it's just a smile that captures a moment and not a person...
i think lauren is lovely. although she looks great in pictures...nothing beats being able to look at her face to see that joy that is so wonderfully expressed on it when she laughs, or smiles, or makes one of her great faces :) what is it is that makes a person attractive? how do we learn to discern what is truly attractive and beautiful from lust, or what the world tells us? i guess what is most like God. because he is beautiful and incredibly attractive.
what i am trying to understand is how you can look at something and think it is absolutely beautiful in one moment, and then not be sure in another...i think this is one of the hardest things for me to think about. isn't it just one of the two? can it be both?? do you just have to choose one??
i don't know. you might just have to be around them. see the way they talk, the way they move...i don't know.
i am okay with being me, as weird as i look or feel at times. completely unique. just the way God intended me to be.
and one day, i can hope it will be enough.
i took these because i was thinking about these things waiting for meagan in the central market parking lot.
this is me. my dad's nose, mom's eyes. a combination of the two.
it's not my best look for sure. this week hasn't exactly been normal.
this is me. |
| | Posted 3/9/2009 11:48 AM - 20 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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